Our inaugural featured boobery highlights irony. For your pleasure, we have culled 5 delightful and deplorable disconnects between content and form:
5. The Grammar Vandal at http://thegrammarvandal.wordpress.com/: “But, seriously: this blog is about advertisements and businesses and professional writing. In short, writing that should be proofread before being presented to the public. I care about professionalism.”
OFFENSES: Comma after coordinating conjunction; fragment.
4. The Old-Fashioned Punctuator at http://forum.starmen.net/forum/General/Discussion/The-Oxford-Comma: “I was taught to put the comma but I don’t think it’s totally necessary. It’s optional. It’s a little piece of style in writing. Just a little one.Or even more complex if there is something like: We were with my friend, a swimmer and a hiker. You just made me a firm believer in the Oxford comma. I’ve never heard that example but I love it. Unfortunately I’m a comma abuser and you’re now an enabler…When I correct friend’s papers, I always place the comma in there. I’m a bit old fashioned when it comes to punctuation and grammar.”
OFFENSES: No comma with coordinating conjunction; fragment; no space after period; fragment; no comma with coordinating conjunction; no comma with introductory clause; no comma with coordinating conjunction; apostrophe misuse; hyphenation error.
3. Grammar Girl (Guru) at http://grammar.quickanddirtytips.com/: “Mignon Fogarty is the host of Grammar Girl and founder of Quick and Dirty Tips. Prior to becoming a grammar guru, Mignon was a magazine and technical writer, and an entrepreneur. Mignon has a B.A. in English from the University of Washington in Seattle and an M.S. in biology from Stanford University.”
OFFENSE: Comma Misuse — No comma is needed after “writer” because there are only two items in the series: writer (1) and entrepreneur (2). She is correctly comma-less in the first and last sentence, both of which have two items listed.
2. The Non-Discriminator at Twentysomething.wordpress: “Ever since Vampire Weekend brought it to my attention, I have become obsessed with oxford commas. But I don’t discriminate. I’m also having a renewed love affair with full stops, exclamation points and commas in general…And heaven help the person who forgets to punctuate in my presence.”
OFFENSE: Lack of Oxford Comma
1. National Grammar Day at www.nationalgrammarday.com: “Language is something to celebrate, and March 4 is the perfect day to do it. It’s not only a date, it’s an imperative: March forth on March 4 to speak well, write well, and help others do the same!”
PRIMARY OFFENSE: Comma Splice -- There is no good reason to separate independent clauses with a comma (unless you’re as dramatic as Caesar the Splicer). While we recognize that commas can sometimes separate very short independent clauses (from a non-purist point of view), we believe there are several better options for punctuating this sentence. A semi-colon would be fine, though a bit clunky. A dash would work and allow for the current colon (a nice one) to stay. But in terms of form reflecting content, we think that “It’s not only a date: it’s (also) an imperative!” is ideal.
SECONDARY OFFENSE: Not only … but also
While secondary to the splice, this parallel structure is important for a completely correct utterance.
5. The Grammar Vandal at http://thegrammarvandal.wordpress.com/: “But, seriously: this blog is about advertisements and businesses and professional writing. In short, writing that should be proofread before being presented to the public. I care about professionalism.”
OFFENSES: Comma after coordinating conjunction; fragment.
4. The Old-Fashioned Punctuator at http://forum.starmen.net/forum/General/Discussion/The-Oxford-Comma: “I was taught to put the comma but I don’t think it’s totally necessary. It’s optional. It’s a little piece of style in writing. Just a little one.Or even more complex if there is something like: We were with my friend, a swimmer and a hiker. You just made me a firm believer in the Oxford comma. I’ve never heard that example but I love it. Unfortunately I’m a comma abuser and you’re now an enabler…When I correct friend’s papers, I always place the comma in there. I’m a bit old fashioned when it comes to punctuation and grammar.”
OFFENSES: No comma with coordinating conjunction; fragment; no space after period; fragment; no comma with coordinating conjunction; no comma with introductory clause; no comma with coordinating conjunction; apostrophe misuse; hyphenation error.
3. Grammar Girl (Guru) at http://grammar.quickanddirtytips.com/: “Mignon Fogarty is the host of Grammar Girl and founder of Quick and Dirty Tips. Prior to becoming a grammar guru, Mignon was a magazine and technical writer, and an entrepreneur. Mignon has a B.A. in English from the University of Washington in Seattle and an M.S. in biology from Stanford University.”
OFFENSE: Comma Misuse — No comma is needed after “writer” because there are only two items in the series: writer (1) and entrepreneur (2). She is correctly comma-less in the first and last sentence, both of which have two items listed.
2. The Non-Discriminator at Twentysomething.wordpress: “Ever since Vampire Weekend brought it to my attention, I have become obsessed with oxford commas. But I don’t discriminate. I’m also having a renewed love affair with full stops, exclamation points and commas in general…And heaven help the person who forgets to punctuate in my presence.”
OFFENSE: Lack of Oxford Comma
1. National Grammar Day at www.nationalgrammarday.com: “Language is something to celebrate, and March 4 is the perfect day to do it. It’s not only a date, it’s an imperative: March forth on March 4 to speak well, write well, and help others do the same!”
PRIMARY OFFENSE: Comma Splice -- There is no good reason to separate independent clauses with a comma (unless you’re as dramatic as Caesar the Splicer). While we recognize that commas can sometimes separate very short independent clauses (from a non-purist point of view), we believe there are several better options for punctuating this sentence. A semi-colon would be fine, though a bit clunky. A dash would work and allow for the current colon (a nice one) to stay. But in terms of form reflecting content, we think that “It’s not only a date: it’s (also) an imperative!” is ideal.
SECONDARY OFFENSE: Not only … but also
While secondary to the splice, this parallel structure is important for a completely correct utterance.
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